Beelzebub's Official Match thread: Klopp's Nivia 'softlads' vs The Mighty Demons of Southampton

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Areola Grandee posted this 5 weeks ago - Last edited 5 weeks ago

 As I have yet to be sacked second time, here it is. The big one. Reminding me of my greatest battles, from getting that daft cow to 'eat my apple'  lou_wink2 back in  the big G's garden during my first season, to possessing a young lady called Margaret who did great things in my name, great things... (although to be fair she seemed rather accommodating and 'pleased to see me') this match once again pits good versus evil. Having said that some of my best works was in convincing them to part with 20mil for that heap of shit in defence... but I dont like to brag... 

Klopp has the look of a scruffy Jesus in a cheap community theatre production of 'that story' crossed with a piss smelling wino, although he likes death metal so cant be all bad...  but its the sense of entitlement to greatness that makes me want to smite the the Nivia encrusted little fuckers. 

Sadly, several of the best demons, suffered blows this week... when denied the chance to participate in FIFA's own statanic ritual in one of my favourite countries (easy pickings) next summer, so they might need a little 'divine' intervention... lou_lol (another great gag,no?)

I suspect Kloppy will be more 'Son of God' this week than pissed up wino, so we may struggle....

sadly my prediction in this battle is ...

2-0

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BTripz posted this 5 weeks ago

Ah, so my hints finally worked then lou_lol

BTripz posted this 5 weeks ago

Will the drunken death metal freak even be there?

BTripz posted this 5 weeks ago

Is Mane injured again? If so I see a ground out 1-0 to Liverpool.

If not 8-2 to Liverpool

In no futures do I see Southampton getting anything.

BTripz posted this 5 weeks ago

And no sooner do I ask than.....

BTripz posted this 5 weeks ago

Is Ben Dinnery his real name?

Fatso posted this 5 weeks ago

We will lose. Probably 3-0 but could be 4.

TheMightyOstrich posted this 5 weeks ago

0-0!

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Fatso posted this 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by TheMightyOstrich

0-0!

 Fucking happy clapper

BTripz posted this 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by TheMightyOstrich

0-0!

 Burying your head in the sand again I see.....

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Cobham Saint posted this 5 weeks ago

1:2

Lovren to score ours if playing

Sfcsim posted this 5 weeks ago

It is not going to be fun. Not like the semi final anyway! 

Anywhere from 2/3/4 - 1. If we cannot score against this lot we should give up now! 

Bucks posted this 5 weeks ago

Mane will be missing.  Either the game, or our net.  Or both.  Sorted.

0-1

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Rust Cohle posted this 5 weeks ago

Just read that Pellegrino wants us to carry on playing as we have been.   I guess that means we wont score and will at best draw 0-0.    Or am I being too harsh? 

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TheMightyOstrich posted this 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by BTripz

Originally posted by TheMightyOstrich

0-0!

 Burying your head in the sand again I see.....

 You may say I'm a dreamer...

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lifeintheslowlane posted this 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by TheMightyOstrich

Originally posted by BTripz

Originally posted by TheMightyOstrich

0-0!

 Burying your head in the sand again I see.....

 You may say I'm a dreamer...

 ...but you're not the only one.

0 - 0 for me too.

BTripz posted this 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by Rust Cohle

Just read that Pellegrino wants us to carry on playing as we have been.   I guess that means we wont score and will at best draw 0-0.    Or am I being too harsh? 

 Surely, surely it must have been a misquote, surely, please

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Rallyboy posted this 5 weeks ago - Last edited 5 weeks ago

If Mane is carrying a minor hamstring problem I'm all for him starting - and sprinting as fast as he can, as soon as possible.

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Saint or sinner posted this 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by Rallyboy

If Mane is carrying a minor hamstring problem I'm all for him starting - and sprinting as fast as he can, as soon as possible.

 Whilst warming up would be ideal.

 1-2 Boufal special and a  header for the winner(VVD would be funny, just to annoy them, but i think Agustín).

lifeintheslowlane posted this 5 weeks ago - Last edited 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by Saint or sinner

Originally posted by Rallyboy

If Mane is carrying a minor hamstring problem I'm all for him starting - and sprinting as fast as he can, as soon as possible.

 Whilst warming up would be ideal.

 1-2 Boufal special and a  header for the winner(VVD would be funny, just to annoy them, but i think Agustín).

lou_surprised I know Tin Man has a record of scoring at Anfield...but didn't he retire some time ago??

Fowllyd posted this 5 weeks ago

Originally posted by BTripz

Originally posted by Rust Cohle

Just read that Pellegrino wants us to carry on playing as we have been.   I guess that means we wont score and will at best draw 0-0.    Or am I being too harsh? 

 Surely, surely it must have been a misquote, surely, please

What he actually said was that if we carry on playing as we are then the goals, and therefore the wins, will come. It's pretty obvious that we're creating chances but not taking them, so I can see where he's coming from.