Juvenile Unit #2 has been chatting with her pals today about all the stupid crap their dads have bought. My DK2 and X52 Flight Sticks made the list, largely because they spend most of their time sitting on a shelf.
The DK2 was a bad decision. I know people really into their clothes that’ll think nothing of spending hundreds on a single item while flush, only to think “fuuuuuck” when it has caught their eye while skint. Most of us have been there.
Buying a whole team of prostitutes for my 40th present to myself, but then getting my dates mixed up with the all day drinking session and being comatose when they arrived.
the Eigth pint, the third bottle of wine, or the whiskey at the end of a sesh
the running machine - expensive clothes horse
my old rover 213 rusted around me
my slr camera - couldnt arsed to work out how to use it properly
That engagement ring.
Why oh why did i do it?
Nothing will ever compare to that mistake.
15 years old and I thought I was as cool as fuck as I made my way to that London to kit myself out in some mod gear that i’d spent a long time saving for. I’d already bought a parka from the old Army surplus store in Portswood, but a trip to Carnaby Street would surely seal my status as a cool bastard amongst my peers. I spent all my money on three items of clothing; a pair of two tone bowling shoes, a second hand coat (probably from a tramp) and a pair of burgundy stay-press strides.
Needless to say I looked like a total cunt.
I’ve always regretted that trip. Fashion and I are not best buddies.
Which one?
I wouldn’t write about fashion on here.
In my experience they are more philistines than fashionistas.
10’’ Black dildo (realistic look and feel aparently) as a christmas gift. Gran was not amused
That’s a bit rich considering some would say there is an element of the sartorially challenged about your good self
Has she still got it?
(asking for a friend)
Suppose so, she insisted on being buried with it
Originally posted by @cobham-saint
Originally posted by @Saint-or-sinner
That engagement ring.
Why oh why did i do it?
Nothing will ever compare to that mistake.
Which one?
Do you think that I’ve done it more than once and can still follow Saints abroad?
That once was a very painful and expensive experience. £20k in legal bills alone.
Fuck i hate that women. Can’t say that in front of the kids obviously.
Best advice I can give anyone. Don’t marry a western women. Statistically your going to end up with a fat, lazy, moaning thing, that has no resemblance to the person you met. I would advise Asian.
My apologies to any women that read this. It must sound terrible(unless you weigh more than me).
As instructed by the note on the shop door, myself and a mate eagerly went and got Zack from The Glebe so we could get our first tattoos done. As dumbass 16 year olds, no warning signs flashed up that the man who was about to ink you for life, had been in the pub all lunchtime. Nope, it seemed like a great idea at the time.
… it wasn’t 
Ooops…
Guess that would make you think twice before doing it again…
I know a bloke bought Jimmy Savile’s Rolls Royce as a an investment. 
Rather than being a flash celebrity motor it pretty soon turned into a mobile crime scene and had to be re-registered to disguise the identity.
Yeah… bit harsh. Some of us aren’t all into getting married and making people’s lives a misery.
Paying for an Arch Bishops Special Marriage License so me and Mrs C_S could get Married in Madchester where she’s from and has a small family
The aim was to put off the myriads of the C_S family from the New Forest / Waterside
You wouldn’t believe how many cheapskates would travel over 300 miles for free food and beer (apologies to any family on here who recognise themselves 
) - I could have saved them a fortune in travel costs and me £90-odd quid for the license…
Yeah right. Sleeper cell.
Pink loafers with tassles in the eighties. Baby-faced Don Johnson.
Why buy the cow when you get the misery for free?
(Sorry intiniki - you walked right into that)