FA Cup final : Gooners for a day

Szczesny looks like a smack addict

Ooh! dirty Sanchez!

Dirty Sanchez is sexual slang for a purported sex act where feces is purposely smeared onto a partner’s upper lip. Sex-advice columnist Dan Savage says the act is completely fictional

Thanks Theo.

My friend scared the shit out of him once in town.

He saw Theo walking towards him and thought: “I know that geezer, where do I know him from? Does he owe me money?” As he approached, my mate stopped him by putting his hand in the middle of his chest and got right in his face saying: “Wossup bro, where I know you from?” All aggressive like. Walcott nearly pooped his pants, backed off quickly saying: “I’m Theo Walcott, I play for Saints.”

“Ahhhh…alright mate, how’s it going?” My mate says with a big grin.

Nervous laugh and a quick exit for little Theo.

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i woke up one time to find a distinct smell of fish, and bird sniggering + struggling to keep straight face. Turns out, i was sporting a fanny juice moustache. She considered this to be Hilarious.

I have a very similar story!!!

When I was a kid, I did door to door collections for Swaything footbal club. I was wearing a Saints patch, and I called on Hugh Fisher’s house in Bitterne. I knocked on his door, and Hugh himself answered! I was all like, give me some money, I don’t recognise you at the moment, but will realise who you are about a week later. He was all like, here is your money kid, now fuck off.

Had we both realised who we both were, we would probably have become lifelong stalking buddies. I would have taken pics of him wanking in the shower, and he would have stalked me with court orders telling me to fuck off…

Life as it could, and should have been. :frowning:

some hit that! Reminds me of Steven Davis.

Dust off the passport Mrs Goaty, one of us is going to Europe.

Get in some lube Mrs Goaty. I’m going to England!

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Similar amount of swerve, but Davis tends to screw deeper.

You’ll be needing some grit for purchase.

Cancel the lube, Mrs. Goaty. I’ve just remembered I have some library books that I need to return.

Nipples like jcb starter buttons though.

Grealish is a horrible whining scrote.

I’m on holiday for the European qualifier :slight_frown:

Because we have an excess of positive posters over negative ones, I feel duty bound to warn everyone that we will regret getting into Europe’s premier European cup competition*.

*excluding the Champions’ League.

Hooray. Saints have qualified for European qualification via the league. I remember being told repeatedly in that other place that such dreams were beyond us! They actually might be; think we have to play qualifying round first.

Onto Crapzeb Wilbeatus!

YES!!!

Well hopefully, it nixes any chance of Liverpool nicking any of our players. Any move really would just be based on the paypacket, because beyond that, they’re not really offering anything we aren’t right now.

In the history of humanity have so many words been understood by so few. An entire paragraph wrapping a conundrum around an enigma and secreting itself within a pile of dog shit…In short, I just didn’t really understand it. :frowning:

I hope you enjoyed the Churchill references though! :slight_smile:

Originally posted by @Coxford_lou

YES!!!

Oh YES!!! YES!!! YESSSSS!!!

Was it good for you too? :kiss: