🗣 Gigs

Festivals…why?

I stand to be corrected (not really) but yesterday I suffered people chatting throughout every set, ignoring the music, often with their backs to the stage, off their faces on overpriced beer - and some of them wearing fucking ridiculous little trilbies or straw hats.

They are not music fans!

If they were they’d watch some of the fucking show - and who takes a frigging selfie-stick to a gig??

Next year I’ll launch PapFields.

Visitors will be able to get so drunk in a field that they can ignore the radio I’ll have playing in the corner. - £75 each for advance booking, £85 on the day unless you arrive drunk, then it’s £500.

And the stupid hat stall will be there, you can dress like you work at a horse fayre or you can try to create some Olly Murs look.

The only people who have ever looked cool in stupid hats are members of the Specials, Harry Worth or Kid Creole.

Something for the ladies too - bring an old garden chair and get in the fucking way because you’re off your face on warm Asda Pimms at £30 a jug and hanging out of your ill-fitting mumsy dress.

Then again it is the only time your dad-dancing husband has taken you out in six months so fuck it.

And he can’t talk, look at his fucking hat!

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You’ve got to love The Raleighboy and his contemporary references such as Harry Worth.

Also, my mate Halo rocks a trilby and a homburg - but he’s an old Jew so that’s OK.

P.S. when to the PapFields tickets go on sale? Put me down for one in the circle.

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Not sure what you expect, RB. Heaven 17 were shit the first time round. Drinking overpriced beer with overweight people while wallowing in nostalgia…I feel slightly dead inside just contemplating it.

Get a little trilby, that will make you feel better.

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Common People day 2. Completely missed Chas and Dave as too busy being comfortable on some chairs drinking an expensive cocktail. Watched Cuban Brothers then Science of Eight Limbs followed by Katy B (I needed some warmth from a crowd) and ended with Duran Duran who were excellent.

Check out Science of Eight Limbs. We quite enjoyed them.

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I have heard from many different people that Duran Duran were really good. That’s my boys!

They were. I was up for taking the piss but fair’s fair - they can play a bit and the stage show was properly, un-ironically good.

Gits.

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Originally posted by @Rallyboy

I stand to be corrected (not really) but yesterday I suffered people chatting throughout every set, ignoring the music, often with their backs to the stage, off their faces on overpriced beer - and some of them wearing fucking ridiculous little trilbies or straw hats.

They are not music fans!

Well you nailed it at the top of your diatribe. Those are exactly the people that hardened festival-lovers can’t stand. Unfortunately empirical evidence has shown that the more mainstream the festival, the higher the percentage of these that you get.

Cunts.

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I like the idea of a festival. Let’s start small. Three stages across Daisy Dip. Decent location. Not far from me mums. Plenty of fences to jump over.

Can I run the Tweed Tent?

Promotional slogan…“No electricity allowed, bring your worries and angst and leave with more

There were quite a few “young uns” near me who at the beginning of Duran Duran were there to take the piss. Most stayed and appeared to have enjoyed it by the end. I was a huge fan as a kid so I am a bit biased but had wondered all these years later whether it would be too cheesey. Didn’t think it was at all.

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I dunno, bletch. The festival bar is pretty high these days, even at a local level.

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Says the man who takes pride in getting “an early night”.

Can I be in charge of the children’s entertainment?

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Last night was the same at The Brook - Midge Ure doing quiet numbers with people at the back talking throughout.

Why pay good money to ignore an act??

At one point he said, ‘this new song is a quiet number and I’m very proud of it, so if the person next to you starts chatting or checking Facebook on their phones, just fucking hit them!’

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It’s so disrespectful, not just to the band that you have paid to see, but the fans around you. I just use thos

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So then, the local had a fella called Dean Friedman playing last night and being the supportive locals we are, we pitched up in support. Us old uns will remember (or not) this guy from the 70s when he had a few hits - Ariel, Lucky Stars and Lydia are the ones I vaguely remembered. Not expecting much and just being there for the craic, I was more than pleasantly surprised. His songs were witty and sometimes poignant. He made plenty of jokes about Trump in between songs which won the 40 strong audience over pretty quickly and he hung around at the bar after to chat for a while. We actually bought one of his CDs from him and had a great evening. Didnt see that coming at all. If nothing else, Dean reminded me that not all Yanks are cunts.

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Add to that people who start fighting. Watching Sean McGowan on Saturday he had to stop and tell people to stop and that there were kids in the tent. I’ve seen that at a few gigs. I remember at Reading fest in early 2000s a group started chucking stones at each other during Gomez. They were bloody large stones

Couples who just need to go home and have sex also annoy me at gigs. Go home, put the album on and get it on. Stop taking up valuable space at the venue.

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Should I go to ACDC with Axl Rose tonight with my partner? I am not really a fan of ACDC but think it may be interesting.

They’re pros…they’ll put on a show…but honestly…Na not for me.

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