❓🤷‍♀️ How did this become a thing?

Stop beating around the bush. There is only 1 steak

26 ounce Porterhouse

Medium

Skinny Jeans.

I mean seriously.

It’s almost farking impossible now to buy a pair of “normal” Jeans.

I don’t need my scrotum rammed into my arse thankyou very much, and also in temperatures of 30 C or so it is kind of helpful to let SOME air circulate.

Next I’ll be forced to grow a beard, wear glasses drink craft beers eat Avocado and say awesome a lot.

But don’t force me to post on Instagram.

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Throwing acid into someone’s face seems to be a thing now. WTF?

There comes a time in every man’s life when he has to stop shopping at Topshop & All Saints.

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Victim culture seems to be growing by the day. Today’s victim is Annabelle Fuller who shacked up with Nigel Farage but was told to keep it all hush hush for the sake of the cause (UKIP). At the risk of sounding like the Duckster, you did have a choice Annabelle and you chose to go along with it. Hooking up with married men who remain married probably tells you all you need to know about your place in the relationship and your future within that relationship.

Gentlemen…there is no steak battle here… they are all rather wonderful if cooked correctly… that is the only must. Be it a simple Entrecote (has to be a proper french cut), the finest Kobe/Wagu beef filet, A wondefully marbled Rib Eye, or even a big thick cut Sirloin on the BBQ… all are welcome. Just dont nuke the fucker and we will be at peace.

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And I cannot argue with that

Cake Smash photos

Apparently parents are now hiring professional photographers to take pictures of their darling baby on its first birthday smashing the shit out a perfectly edible cake.

Gannon.

Look I try and take smoked Gannon Joints home to slow cook in cider with mash broad beans parsley sauce and the cider reduction.

But why is that a thing on Twitter.

Was Greg James involved he was rambling on the wireless Monday.

What is the Farage link?

Newest hipster insult - up there with Remoaner or Brexidiot in the hilarity stakes

A Gammon is, generally, a middle aged male who goes bright red when they get worked up about something, i.e. arch Brexiters or Remainers.

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Ah, so White Van men and Politicians then

Signature this, Signature that, WTF is all this Signature crap.

Have you tried our Signature Dish? Our local chain pub is now advertising, “Have you tried our Signature Fuckin’ Pies?”
On last weeks cruise the photography department asks, “Have You Tried Our Signature Photoshoot?”

Looks sunshine…append anything “Signature” and I can assure you we’re going nowhere near your stupid suggestions. :rage:

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Boris feels the same way :lou_wink_2:

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Wait, WHAT?

Jazz Bagpipes?

Almost as enjoyable as The Red Hot Chilli Pipers

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Normally I hate the fuckin’ Bagpipes but that is well…acceptable. It certainly helps the instrument not having those squealing, wailing, discordant drone pipes.

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I think it was Mark Twain who said that his definition of a gentleman was somebody who knew how to play the bagpipes, but chose not to.

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I remember just before I was married the Ayatollah, we were on holiday in Greece. Sat at the bar after dinner, I span her a yarn that I would like to celebrate my Greek ancestry at the wedding by having “Greek bagpipes” played during the ceremony.

She called bullshit and resolutely refused to believe such a thing existed despite my persistence.

Anyway, half an hour later a sound carried across the harbour and got increasingly louder. Bagpipes.

Her jaw hit the floor, I said there must be a wedding going on, they will be parading round the town. She spent the next ten minutes panicking coming up with a thousand reasons why it would be a bad idea, until round the corner came twenty jocks on a stag night. Good times

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when played badly i would agree…

but when played well, can stir the old heartstrings

Fucking Scotch nonsense.

Just like the tape, the egg and the broth.

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