Moving house - the correct etiquette

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Fatso posted this 18 August 2016

I am planning ahead as I shall be moving into a new house in a few months. I have been in discussion with the wife about whether we should introduce ourselves to our new neighbours or wait for them. She is adamant that she won't be introducing herself as she says its weird. This has somewhat surprised me as she is the out-going and friendly one that everyone likes and I'm the miserable, angry one that everyone hates. Part of my question, as my wife has correctly identified, is because I worry about this sort of stuff and the thought of meeting new people normally fills me with dread. I generally avoid most people. 

I have done the research and googled the answer to my question. Unfortuantely I have found some very mixed messages. This response is as weird as they come, as far as I'm concerned, but was ranked as the "best" answer.....

Internet person said:

Actually, proper etiquette would be for them to come to you, as you are the new arrival. It would be rude for you to force yourself upon people who are already established there.

However, we live in different times and you can't expect anyone to come as we are all so transient now that new arrivals are more frequent. Neighbors often don't know each other. I think you hve to respect their space for a while. After about a month or so, send a card around to your neighbors introducing yourself and letting them know you are there. Let them know you are interested in getting to know them and include you phone number. You might also have an open house after a while to meet and greet. Don't press too hard, as they might think you are a bit odd.

Now that sounds like the most weird thing you could possibly do. Sending a card after a month with your phone number in it? Fuck off. Thats the response of a sex pest.

But I found this Daily Mail article from 2013 that says only one in three people introduce themselves to their neighbours and lamenting the loss of community. I don't want to be responsible for the loss of community but equally I don't want to be a sex pest.

What is the correct thing to do?

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Chertsey Saint posted this 18 August 2016

I would say introduce yourself. If you don't you end up with Mason's blocking your fucking drive...

saintbletch posted this 18 August 2016

You'll be fine. Don't worry.

Once the fire brigade has fork-lifted you and your bed through the hole vacated by the removal of your bedroom window frame, I don't think the neighbours will be answering the door to Mrs Fatstuff. 

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steveintheforest posted this 18 August 2016

Can't wait to hear what the forums resident 'etiquette guru' Bearsy has to say on the matter

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Cobham Saint posted this 18 August 2016

If their WiFi is password protected  go around and introduce yourself - and point out that it's not neighbourly to restrict your access to the interweb.

If their WiFi is open, then don't bother...

Barry Sanchez posted this 18 August 2016

Just throw the keys in the bowl and away you go, it'll all be good.

Areola Grandee posted this 18 August 2016

Yes they should come round to welcome you with  some  wine, bread, and salt - Watch 'Its a Wonderful Life' - the only advice you need on this and all subject to have a happy and contented life...

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Fatso posted this 18 August 2016

I might ask on SWF, they seem to know more about the world.

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TedMaul posted this 18 August 2016

The correct thing to do is stop reading the mail onlinelou_facepalm2

TedMaul posted this 18 August 2016

Aside from that as your wife was saying in bed yesterday ...

Sfcsim posted this 18 August 2016 - Last edited 18 August 2016

Get the BBQ fired up and the beers chilled, stick some invites through the door of the neighbours and see who turns up! 

This way you only have to bother with the ones who can be arsed! 

Believe me this works. We have moved 7 times in the last 10 years! 

We have wasted a fair bit on BBQ's and beer! 

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TedMaul posted this 18 August 2016

If you make any life decisions based on best ranked yahoo answers then ...

Fatso posted this 18 August 2016

Originally posted by Sfcsim

Get the BBQ fired up and the beers chilled, stick some invites through the door of the neighbours and see who turns up! 

This way you only have to bother with the ones who can be arsed! 

Believe me this works. We have moved 7 times in the last 10 years! 

We have wasted a fair bit on BBQ's and beer! 

 Fuck that. 

Fatso posted this 18 August 2016

Originally posted by TedMaul

If you make any life decisions based on best ranked yahoo answers then ...

 How else do people know what to do if its not yahoo (or Sotonians)?

TedMaul posted this 18 August 2016

 "How else do people know what to do if its not yahoo"

You've answered Yahoo ad companies dreams laughing

Intiniki posted this 18 August 2016 - Last edited 19 August 2016

Moved 3 times since 2012. We haven't introduced ourselves at any places. In Poole, the neighbours on one side introduced themselves and we would have a chat about their cats over the wall. The last place was 8 flats and on the first day one of the women from below us knocked on the door with post. She told us the noise went around the block awfully (hint hint don't wear heels and walk about). She was correct we could hear the neighbours above being rather amourous. Moved into new block last November. We were one of the first in. Apart from picking up a few packages from others we haven't invited them around to party on our balcony. I have shouted across to another neighbour warming them about leaving their kid on a balcony with no adult care. So sure they are going to invite me around. I don't remember as kids my parents ever going around and introducing themselves. 

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Saint or sinner posted this 18 August 2016

Do nothing, you'll just look a cunt.

Wait and your other half will deal with it(friendly and out going). She'll decide who she likes and who you can talk too. It's the safest and easiest way.

Rallyboy posted this 18 August 2016

We had people move in next door quite recently - funnily enough I had the same thought and decided against rushing round there with the milk and cookies approach.

Instead I just welcomed them when I eventually saw them - but three weeks had gone by and it nearly became pointless.

Try the Goat approach - climb up a drainpipe adjacent to their bathroom and press your genitals against the frosted glass.

They won't be hassling you for cups of sugar or to borrow the lawn mower.

Sfcsim posted this 18 August 2016

Well we used to have those low wire fences when I was growing up. Parents used to just talk over the fences to some next door or others a few doors down or over the back. Now we have 6 foot fences up and like our privacy. Used to go and ask to have some coffee or milk, as you used to run out with nowhere to go... Or was that just on the tv? 

I have to say most of the people we talk to in Carlisle, are through their kids knowing ours! 

Fatso posted this 18 August 2016

Yes, we used to have the small fences when we were little. I cant remember the last time I saw a small fence between gardens. What a funny thing. 

Sfcsim posted this 18 August 2016

Originally posted by Fatso

Yes, we used to have the small fences when we were little. I cant remember the last time I saw a small fence between gardens. What a funny thing. 

 When did it all change? What triggered it? Did it happen overnights? Tell you what let's put one of these 6 foot fences up, so when it is windy we have to replace a panel every fucking year! Those little fences lasted forever! It was supposed to be for security, but I think it was because we all started hating each other!