Nicknames

I do not really have any nicknames, apart from Simbad, Simeone (when I was a little younger and pretty handy on the football field)

I was wondering if you guys have any nick names that you have got and they have stuck, for any random reason?

A friend of mine up here is called ‘spider’ and the reason, 25 years ago he bought 4 pairs of jeans on a shopping trip with his mates. His kids now call him spider.

Another is called ‘hong kong’ as he visited Singapore about 20 years ago!

Any stories would be good.

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I once knew this chap called Bearsy, his nickname was price pikey

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I am known as Fatso because I was one half of the 1990s musical duo Phats and Small (I was Phats). True story.

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At Uni ‘Gav’ became ‘Gavster’ which became ‘Gavstar’ (because of a mis-hearing as I am lead to understand, the latter stuck). Unimaginitive but I have fully embraced it. At school my mate’s surname was Brown, as a result his nickname became ‘Skiddies’ because poo is brown and makes brown skidmarks. Another mate’s name was James, which became ‘James the cat’ (after the shit cartoon of the same name) which became ‘Kattomeat’ (after the popular cat food) which evolved into ‘Kattomeat shitlumps’, he hated it and looking back I regret calling him it but it was funny at the time.

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Some of my friends:

Andy Fartsack

The Giant Watermelon

Wetty Wet-trousers

Fuck Off

Princess Neil of the Wuthering Vale

Rob

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I was always the Chris Tavare of Village Cricketers, an Opening Batsman in the true mould (before this infernal T20 malarky)

It was my job to take the shine off the new ball so I would aim to score about 20 runs on a good day in about 25 overs of a 40 over match.

One day we needed some quick runs. The oppo bought on a pie chucker on a soggy wet mattress of a pitch, he kept dropping the ball at about 30mph in the middle of the wicket and kaboom. My normal score in the first over.

The watching lads were so shocked they debated whether I had been possessed by Ian Botham. So Boff stuck for decades.

Today?

I am Uncle Phil.

That is SO disheatertening when you chat to a fiteh and she says “Oh you must be Uncle Phil”… Hey ho

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What a load of rubbish.

You were “The Count” from Sesame Street.

One, ha ha ha.

Two, ha, ha, ha…

Etc.

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I did have a magic moment in a Gap outlet mall some years back, finding a T Shirt with “Uncle Phil’s fishing trips come & catch a big one…”

Best $5 I’ve ever spent worked a treat

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Stop thief!

or

Oi…! you!

are ones I answer to…

:lou_wink_2:

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I had a friend called Simon Hill - People started calling him Grangie after Grange Hill.

Later, a kid’s series called Grim Grange was aired and Grangie became Grim.

Throughout secondary school, many people only knew him as Grim and had no idea what his real name was!

Good god, I forgot that one ha ha ha! I wonder why? Even dyed my hair to get away from it! I was think of ones that people still use now. Thank goodness that one died a long time ago!

Not really, mate. Not really.

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After one of my dad’s postings to Germany our belongings got lost on the way over, we had to live in the clothes that we brought over in the car until our belongings arrived (took about 2 weeks).

So I turned up at my new schol wearing the same clothes for a week, I was known as Poorboy after that.

Kids can be cruel!

In my pool team (have I mentioned I play in a pool league on Wednesday night) I have to wear a team t-shirt with my nickname on the back of it, that being Kate!!

I’ll leave you to work out why!!

My mates are complete idiots, so I have managed to amass a fair few over the years.

Davina - being a moody teenager, I was referred to as ‘constantly pregnant’, therefore, Davina (McCall)

Jen - Apparently one day walking into the pub, my hair looked like JLaw’s in a certain Oscar look (I also had a tshirt matching her dress colour that night)

Thor - Tall, long blonde hair, beard. Bout it.

Aslan - mostly the same as above

Dude - you may see a pattern forming here - Big Lebowski, there may be other traits we share. You can speculate on what they are.

These are the ones I’m happy to share.

Some I know:

Too Tall Tim : because he is tall and called Tim.

Elevenarife: because if you’ve been to Tenerife…

Dideye: because “You made a right twat of yourself when pissed last night.” “Did I?”

Big Fat Johnny Shite Drugs.

Is it on account of your massive bush?

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Is it because you love Willy?

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I didn’t realise we were supposed to explain the reasons:

Andy Fartsack - Andrew, who passed wind in his sleeping bag

The Giant Watermelon - self-explanatory really - fat guy who claimed he had water retention

Wetty Wet-trousers - once had wet trousers and didn’t know why

Fuck Off - nobody actually likes him so it’s one of those ‘many a true word spoken in jest’ nicknames

Princess Neil of the Wuthering Vale - this one is a long and tortuous story and I can’t remember half of it; needless to say it went through about four different incarnations before settling on the final name

Rob - short for Gregory

Personally I think they’re better when they’re not explained :lou_eyes_to_sky: