Road Rage

So on my way to the station this morning there is a strip of dual carriageway which has a 40 limit, and then narrows into one lane with a 30 limit, with oncoming traffic. I was in a row of 5 cars when a middle aged bloke in a Jag came speeding up on the outside lane (probably doing 70), just as it went single lane. He tried to barge in ahead of me but there was no room to, so he braked and ended up behind me. The bloke went mental, flashing his lights, beeping, getting right up my arse (figuratively), old wanker sign etc.

What do you/have you done in this situation? This morning as the road was empty behind him, I slowed down to 15mph, and every time he went to overtake I sped up. Did this for a couple of minutes, until I turned into the station car park.

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Standard operational procedure is to call the offending driver a ā€œfucking cuntā€ at the top of my voice and get on with it. People in cars are fucked up, random and not worth the hassle of dealing with. My missus has barneys with people all the time.

Me? Iā€™m worried Iā€™ll run into the next Tommy Pickering. Terrifying.

I gave up goading nutters like this a few years back - I canā€™t be bothered with it. However a sure fire way I found to get under the skin of anyone who is going mental at you is to blow them a kiss - they generally go postal which is amusing to watch.

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Used to get horrendous road rage.

Iā€™m of a disposition such that I always drive at 100% and consider how my actions affect others. Unfortunately this leads me to expect that others will do the same in return. A state of affairs just begging for disappointment. Not least when a good third of the people you encounter on the roads are barely competent, let alone capable of driving in a way that doesnā€™t fuck with everybody elseā€™s experiences on the road.

I know itā€™s not an option for everybody, but finding a job close enough to walk to has improved my quality of life (and heartrate) immeasurably.

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Who?

Or Kenneth Noye. There are some nutters out there who take their sense of entitlement to extremes when it comes to cars and driving. Sadly you would think that Darwinism would weed them out but they tend to end up killing other people rather than themselves. One of the more interesting installments that I have experienced featured a lyra clad cyclist who knocked on my window and gave me verbals. I had no idea what I had done. I saw him earlier and I was nowhere near him. I continued to give him a wide berth up until a roundabout when he kicked off. There was nothing in his rant that gave me a clue as to what I was supposed to have done and at one point he started to call me ugly. Coming from a grown man dressed in a large condom, he failed to see the irony of the remark, although I did point it out to him. My policy is to drive as safely as I can whilst avoiding the nutters. God knows there are plenty out there.

Have you seen this from TfL? The fact this is even needed says a lot about the increasing incidence, and seriousness, of road rage. Nuts

Originally posted by @areloa-grandee

Originally posted by @pap

Standard operational procedure is to call the offending driver a ā€œfucking cuntā€ at the top of my voice and get on with it. People in cars are fucked up, random and not worth the hassle of dealing with. My missus has barneys with people all the time.

Me? Iā€™m worried Iā€™ll run into the next Tommy Pickering. Terrifying.

Who?

I do apologise. I meant Ronnie Pickering.

Bolloxā€¦ see there was me trying to be clever (and gain some vote ups from thr forum intelligencia) for repsonding 'who?'given the theme of the pickering road rage incidentā€¦ sadly I focused too much on being a smart arse that I missed your errorā€¦ arseā€¦

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Originally posted by @Chertsey-Saint

So on my way to the station this morning there is a strip of dual carriageway which has a 40 limit, and then narrows into one lane with a 30 limit, with oncoming traffic. I was in a row of 5 cars when a middle aged bloke in a Jag came speeding up on the outside lane (probably doing 70), just as it went single lane. He tried to barge in ahead of me but there was no room to, so he braked and ended up behind me. The bloke went mental, flashing his lights, beeping, getting right up my arse (figuratively), old wanker sign etc.

What do you/have you done in this situation? This morning as the road was empty behind him, I slowed down to 15mph, and every time he went to overtake I sped up. Did this for a couple of minutes, until I turned into the station car park.

I do exactly the same as you do, slow down to the speed limit and beyond and watch them boil. Stop at roundabouts and take ages to make up your mind.

I drive a beat up old Clio (on the occasional times I drive to work) so I am less worried about it getting damaged than the person in a brand new BMW/Audi/Mercedes who thinks they own the road. They generally will do anything to avoid damage to their car.

It does seem to be the drivers of German cars who seem to think they have right of way all the time.

Except me Mā€™lud.

Exactly. It is very funny.

Most of the aggresive drivers near me actually tend to drive Golfā€™s and Audiā€™s. BMW drivers arenā€™t that bad anymore imo, and Merc drivers Iā€™ve never had an issue with.

So very true Soggy. Only last week an old man in an Audi forced his way onto a roundabout in front of me when I was already on the roundabout. He then proceeded to try to force his way into an inside lane at a merge point and came very close to hitting a car that had the right of way. When she wouldnā€™t let him, he had another go. She still wouldnā€™t let him in. The traffic ahead stopped, he got out of his car, gave her a load of verbal and then hammered on her driverā€™s window and raised his fist at her.

I wasnā€™t too annoyed when he cut me up because I know there are loads of idiots out there but I got very angry when he threatened that young woman and I really feared for her safety. So I clocked his plate and reported it to the police - not that they could do anything about this incident - so that they had his number on record should he do it again.

I also posted his plate number of my local community FB page.

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A neighbour of mine owns several BMWs. He has recently bought a limited edition car which he is very proud of and boasts of driving it at 130mph along a local road (not a dual carriage way I hasten to add). This is the same guy who sits on the Parish Council and complains of drivers who speed through our village!

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As a rule, I tend to let everyone into the traffic flow.

However, if Iā€™m having a bad day, or Iā€™ve realised just how tiny my penis really is, I keep the aggressive drivers behind me and do things to annoy them.

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I am a little bit more discriminating about who I let into the flow. I only allow those wearing a Sotonians badge.

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I let normal drivers in as long as they are not aggressive or ā€˜broken the rulesā€™. I am certainly a believer in driving karma.

Stop the car, get the pickaxe handle out of the boot and batter the cunt.

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I do like it that you slowed down and sped up to annoy him. This is a good tactic, especially for those who drive very close to the back of your car.