And finally for tonight, The Sotonians Point Sniper Heavyweight Division , reserved for those whacking in more than 1000 posts over the course of 2017.
@rallyboy holds onto his crown for another year, coming top of the punching pile once again. Number one contender is @goatboy , who takes silver in this category. @fatso gets the bronze in this division.
Top 10 for this category is as follows.
Rallyboy 3.593 Goatboy 3.159 Fatso 2.742 lifeintheslowlane 2.503 CB Saint 2.461 Dubai_Phil 2.252 BTripz 2.220 pap 2.127 Cobham Saint 2.064 Sadoldgit 2.037
@btripz believing the @pap , @saintbletch doling out a rare downvote. It’s all kicking off on Sotonians. And they said we’d never have an edge.
In the spirit of lightening the mood after pouring petrol on the fire, I announce a surprise new category, four tins of Red Stripe to the good, making it up as I go along like a totalitarian, eh @tokyo-saint ?
It is with great pleasure that I announce the inaugural winners of the **Sotonians Night Owl **** Award , which replaces the Night Crawler **award. These are the brave souls that keep the fires burning between the hours of witching and five.
Banging in at number one is @dubai_phil , helped massively by the minus four hour time difference, and we love him for it. Second is @philippinesaint , who exists in a state of timezone flux, depending on which airport he’s stuck in. Finally, it not only gives me great pleasure to hand @saintbristol the bronze. I may consider a separate and unique award if he’s posting his late-nighters from the UK. I’m certain the Time Lords would have no problem with this.
He told me that he was aiming for the upvote button, but his eyes were distracted by a garish, gaudy object, he missed the target and dished out an inadvertent downvote. For the life of him, he couldn’t work out what the gaudy object was.
Fucking hell @btripz - you’re really busting my balls this week aren’t you? Look, I’m sorry you only get 2 points per post but, y’know, some of us are edging the magic 3-points-per-post marker. Some are leaders, some are followers, what can I say?
I am sure this outrageous claim was only fueled by our resident bin dipping midget having half a can of cheap Jamaican lager, however, I feel it is important to dispell the rumour about my “first team” and sectarianism.
I would like to make it 100% crystal clear that Sex, Drugs and Mane have no sectarian links whatsoever. The team is made up of a number of players from mixed backgrounds, nationalities and religions. They are of varying abilities and prices with the only common denominator being that all players turn to shit as soon as I bring them in or turn amazing when I transfer them out. Harry Kane and more recently Eden Hazard have demonstrated this perfectly.
We are not sectarian and any hun bastard who says differently can have their kneecaps blown off.
Sex Drugs and Mane. It is my fault that we are shit and I can do something about it.
Saints. Like a shit addiction (e.g speaking with you). I can’t stop it, it is in my blood, I travelled back from Japan to go to Watford in the cup semi-final. I was addicted. Been to a lot of games (all over the UK including some of our smallest crowds) would not wish in you. Northern shithholes not seen outside of 3 girls (you will know the places). Can’t help it. We all know it is a lifetime of pain with moments of joy ruined by DJs playing “Chelsea Chelsea etc” I even worked with us pricks as a kid.
3 Morton - My hometown. Went to loads of games as a kid, usually when visiting family. Haven’t checked their results in years. Worse than saints but I can’t change shit as per 1.
Celtic. Religion I was born into, Great for a trip or stag do. Bonus if it annoys pushing bin dippers like you.
You can send me more friendly PMs next time there is a danger we meet in person. Know that I will respond politely as always but do not forget. Until then, x.