The Match Thread - The Ethos, The Rules, The Etiquette

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  • Last Post 29 January 2018
BTripz posted this 29 January 2018 - Last edited 29 January 2018

1) At the beginning of a new season a random volunteer will start the match thread.

2) The match thread title will be factual and to the point, no humour is allowed. The day and date of the match that the match thread is started for will clearly be indicated in the thread title.

3) The forum member [pleb] who started the match thread will be responsible for starting the next match thread if Southamtpon FC fail to win the match that the pleb started the previous match thread for.

4) If Southampton FC win the match that the match thread was started for then a random pleb volunteer will start the next thread. The pleb who started the previous match thread will stand down from match thread duties for a time.

4) Cup matches, friendlies and ancilliary team games sit outside of the jurisdiction of the match thread rules and can be started by any pleb.

5) Only ONE match thread will be in existence at any one point

6) The pleb formally know as @Chutney Ferret got lucky with his run of match threads, any opinions that he has regarding future match threads are null and void.

7) Any deviation from the above rules will elicit a visit from a member of the Soviet, handie's may or not be involved in the discussion!

8) Any deviation from the above rules will likely result in Southampton FC losing heavily the match that the match thread was started for.

9) These rules, points 2 and 6 excepting, may be amended without warning.

23 Comments
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Tokyo-Saint posted this 29 January 2018

Rule 7. Is that on a rota basis or can we pick who we visit? 

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BTripz posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by Tokyo-Saint

Rule 7. Is that on a rota basis or can we pick who we visit? 

 You have to visit the breaker of the rules! No rota basis, so you can't decide to go handie off @Bearsy just because you can!!

PhilippineSaint posted this 29 January 2018

Luckily as we are going to beat the living shit out of the Brighton boys, B times three will be free to continue his losing /not winning threads when we play away at the West Brom 6 pointer. and probably the game after that as well lou_lol

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BTripz posted this 29 January 2018 - Last edited 29 January 2018

It's too late @PhilippineSaint, I'm a broken thread starter now, my streak was broken in the middle of a not win. I need to exile myself for a while to regain my chi.

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PhilippineSaint posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by BTripz

It's too late @PhilippineSaint, I'm a broken thread starter now, my streak was broken in the middle of a not win. I need to exile myself for a while to regain my chi.

 As a penance for not completing your duties here 

you have been tasked with infiltrating fiver web and starting the West Brom thread over there, straight after the Brighton game finishes. in the spiel mention that it was started by freeman of Paps Kingdom and see how long before it gets locked or deleted.

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Areola Grandee posted this 29 January 2018

...I am beginning to suspect that BTsinkships is a little mithed of his lack of central charcterization in the 'House' - given the previous comment on how 'meaningless extras can be those stupid cunts that can get added to the body count, like red shirted security staff in StarTrek, I am begining to suspect we may have a serial kiler on our hands...  what with CD and all... 

'Lucky' pfttt


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BTripz posted this 29 January 2018 - Last edited 29 January 2018

I am Phelan* lou_facepalm2

*This is a contemporous reference to a character in a modern day soap opera, this is by no way indication or affirmation that I watch said soap opera, rather details have been gained by osmosis**

**Having to sit in the front room whilst said soap opera is playing on the telly box thing because "we never spend any time together"***

***We never spend any time together when football is on the telly box either but that is coincidental****

****And breathe....

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BTripz posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by Areola Grandee

'Lucky' pfttt

Remind us, how many humerous title's did you have to employ before a win happened to happen?

Areola Grandee posted this 29 January 2018 - Last edited 29 January 2018

Originally posted by BTripz

 

2) The match thread title will be factual and to the point, no humour is allowed. The day and date of the match that the match thread is started for will clearly be indicated in the thread title.

 

 Wont be tricky for BT.... lou_flirt

Areola Grandee posted this 29 January 2018 - Last edited 29 January 2018

Originally posted by BTripz

Originally posted by Areola Grandee

'Lucky' pfttt

Remind us, how many humerous title's did you have to employ before a win happened to happen?

 2... a draw and a win.... just call me Obi 'comedy genius' Wan

BTripz posted this 29 January 2018

2? 2? Think you'll find it was nearer to 5

Areola Grandee posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by BTripz

2? 2? Think you'll find it was nearer to 5

 I think you are mistaken, but either way, how long have w egon without a win in using the unfunny titles? half a season! lou_wink2

BTripz posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by BTripz

2? 2? Think you'll find it was nearer to 5

You started 4 before we won...

Before my latest run of bad luck I had a win on my first thread, mind you I only started that thread because @pap was knackered after his 8 hour shifts..

Match threads and who started them :-

@Saint CD
?-? Saints vs Brighton - Weds 31st Jan (7.45pm KO)

@BTripz
1-1 Saints v Spurs - Sun 21st Jan, 16:00 KO
2-2 Saints to be stung into action by the Hornets?
1-2 Can Saints be bald and clip the Eagles wings, Despardo as they are for a win
0-0 Can we avoid a cricket score at Old Trafford, the battle of good v evil
2-5 No more White Hart Pain, Kane we be Spurred on to something, anything!!
1-1 Will the Terriers help dig Saints out of their rabbit hole or will they be nipping at our heels
0-1 The slippery Chelski slope to feeling blue, can we Bridge the gap
1-4 Saints at home midweek, maybe there'll be some interesting possibilities...
1-1 The Wenger Bus is Coming, it's Gooner drive you mad
1-1 The Cherries v the Indomitable Saints
1-2 The Citizens v The "coming back after a difficult period that I don't want to talk about" Saints

@Chutney Ferret
4-1 The cloven hooved one's official match thread: The mighty Demons vs the slickly sweet stuff
3-0 Liverpool v Southampton
0-1 The BIG Match (thread) :The mighty free scoring Saints (prefer demons) vs Raspy Sean's Clarets
1-1 The Sea...... Gulls vs the Mighty fine creative free scoring Saints Match Thread

@TheMightyOstrich
1-0 MoPe's Barmy Army vs. The Song Thrushes
2-2 Red-and-White Stripes vs. Black-and-White Stripes
1-2 People Who Historically Worked with Clay vs. The Mighty Southampton - Match Thread
0-1 Southampton FC ("Kings of the South") vs. Manchester's 2nd Team

@PhilippineSaint
0-2 Southampton V Watford Build up and match day thread
1-0 Crystal Palace V Saints build up and matchday thread
0-0 Uddersfield V Saints on the rebound

@BTripz
3-2 Saints v the Mighty Hammers, 19th August 2017 - Match Thread

@pap
0-0 Saints vs Swans season opener match thread

Areola Grandee posted this 29 January 2018

... Its OK BTslips, its Ok... there is a special place for you in the House afterall... a warm and comfortable place...

Muhahhahahah

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BTripz posted this 29 January 2018 - Last edited 29 January 2018

I think, if you go back over the camera footage, ALL of it, you'll see me there.

I'm the one that's been in the corner, head down, hugging my knees and rocking. If you listen closely you will hear me whisper "I am anathema to Southampton FC!"

Tokyo-Saint posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by BTripz

Originally posted by Tokyo-Saint

Rule 7. Is that on a rota basis or can we pick who we visit? 

 You have to visit the breaker of the rules! No rota basis, so you can't decide to go handie off @Bearsy just because you can!!

 I mean there are 4 of us right? 4 people who can make suggestions to the powers that be to ignore. Who goes out of us 4? Are you up first and we go in alphabetical order from there or do we cover regions? Bear does the north (Birmingham being North), you are south coast, flloyd does Whales (sic) and I will cover any fit ones. Like a dirty sweeper. How would it work? 

Fowllyd posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by Tokyo-Saint

Originally posted by BTripz

Originally posted by Tokyo-Saint

Rule 7. Is that on a rota basis or can we pick who we visit? 

 You have to visit the breaker of the rules! No rota basis, so you can't decide to go handie off @Bearsy just because you can!!

 I mean there are 4 of us right? 4 people who can make suggestions to the powers that be to ignore. Who goes out of us 4? Are you up first and we go in alphabetical order from there or do we cover regions? Bear does the north (Birmingham being North), you are south coast, flloyd does Whales (sic) and I will cover any fit ones. Like a dirty sweeper. How would it work? 

Sorry, but I've read that a couple of times and I can't see where I fit in on the "visit" front. And how did you know about the whales? Whatever, I'll be happy to pay visits to any forum members who like to dress as sheep (or, preferably, who actually are sheep). Just for future reference, isn't it.

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Tokyo-Saint posted this 29 January 2018

what about goats? 

PhilippineSaint posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by Tokyo-Saint

what about goats? 

 Goats give Fowllyd the horn

Fowllyd posted this 29 January 2018

Originally posted by PhilippineSaint

Originally posted by Tokyo-Saint

what about goats? 

 Goats give Fowllyd the horn

They're OK, but all in all I prefer a llama. Or a nice alpaca.