So will Harryâs father be invited to the nuptials?
I remember Private Eye used to have the occasional feature when they would make an excuse to print some innocent story about Harry when he was a child, illustrate it with a photo, then on the facing page print an innocent story about James Hewitt when he was a child and illustrate that with a photo. It is pretty much accepted elsewhere in the world that Hewitt is Harryâs father, newspapers and magazines on the continent and elsewhere have never held back from telling it as it is. Only the British, and to a certain extent the Americans are still desperate to believe the Hans Christian Anderson nonsense. Just look at the headlines in todays newspapers, talking about a âfairytale weddingâ, and other such childish bullshit. Sadly an awful lot of the serfs will buy into it, will be camping out for days, in the cold, outside Buck House, waving their butcherâs aprons, desperate for a glimpse of the happy couple. Embarrassing and sad.
A friend once told me that if you get the folds right on the tea towel when wanking you could make it look like Diana was given you head⌠best I got was a BJ from a deformed Charles
Perhaps we, the public, should demand a DNA test before the wedding goes ahead. Just think of the money we would save if it was proven that he isnt a Royal!
Iâm not a big fan of The Markle. Sheâs a terrible actress, for one thing. Not my type either. Small chested. Also, my bird made me watch an ITV documentary about the Harry and Markle fkn âRomanceâ, and it made me want everyone involved fkn DEAD.
I have to admit though when you study her closely she has got a certain quality about her that makes you think sheâd be a really good fuck. More so than Kate even, although I would let her Watch.
Prince Andrew wanted to marry soft porn starlett Koo Stark. Harry get himself another sulty American actress. Charles ends up with someone who looks like his mother. Being next in line to the throne isnt all it is cracked up to be!
He seems alright for a Royal, to be honest. Not a massive twat like Andrew or a weed gobbler like his stepdad. She seems to be a half tidy bag of carrots too. It will be amusing to see if some stuffy old bastards get upset with him marrying an âoutsiderâ.
Apparently the Daily Heil website has gone into meltdown. Their readership is less than impressed with a common American divorcee becoming a âRoyalâ. And not a pure aryan to boot. Oh dear!
As soon as she is married she will be known as HRH The Duchess of Sussex. Not in this fucking household she wonât.
As a consequence of staying at me maâs for the last few months, Iâve watched the news with my granddad almost every night. I was initially quite shocked when at 84, and with a distinctive but softened Karachi accent, he says âsheâs got small titsâ with reference to the weather presenter.
I have since come to know my granddadâs view on the rack of every female weather presenter since. I try to weigh in with my own contributions, such as my theory that all male weather presenters are short arses that took the job to make them look like giants (âIâm bigger than the UK you tall fucks!â), but heâs not long diverted.
Moaning Merkle⌠was she not in Harry Potter or is this a reference to her joyous vocal exclamations during the fine and noble sculpture of the two backed beast?