Iâm confused.
Donât you need members of the Royal Family for a Royal Wedding?
Wasnt Harry born before Diana started playing hide the sausgae with the ginger tosser?
Iâm sure thatâs the story, and theyâre sticking to it.
So will Harryâs father be invited to the nuptials?
I remember Private Eye used to have the occasional feature when they would make an excuse to print some innocent story about Harry when he was a child, illustrate it with a photo, then on the facing page print an innocent story about James Hewitt when he was a child and illustrate that with a photo. It is pretty much accepted elsewhere in the world that Hewitt is Harryâs father, newspapers and magazines on the continent and elsewhere have never held back from telling it as it is. Only the British, and to a certain extent the Americans are still desperate to believe the Hans Christian Anderson nonsense. Just look at the headlines in todays newspapers, talking about a âfairytale weddingâ, and other such childish bullshit. Sadly an awful lot of the serfs will buy into it, will be camping out for days, in the cold, outside Buck House, waving their butcherâs aprons, desperate for a glimpse of the happy couple. Embarrassing and sad.
Wont be getting a tea towel then?
A friend once told me that if you get the folds right on the tea towel when wanking you could make it look like Diana was given you head⌠best I got was a BJ from a deformed Charles
Perhaps we, the public, should demand a DNA test before the wedding goes ahead. Just think of the money we would save if it was proven that he isnt a Royal!
OMG itâs started, just had an alert pop up from Sky News :-
âHarry and Meghan: First appearance as newly engaged couple - Live on Sky Newsâ
Yeah but I got in first
Times like the next few months Iâm so farking glad I only have Netflix & no news channels.
Youâl be getting sighting alerts, bookies odds alerts etc on all your feeds
Hahaha
Oh shit I have BBC news alerts
Fuck how do you turn them off
Bollocks
Iâm not a big fan of The Markle. Sheâs a terrible actress, for one thing. Not my type either. Small chested. Also, my bird made me watch an ITV documentary about the Harry and Markle fkn âRomanceâ, and it made me want everyone involved fkn DEAD.
I have to admit though when you study her closely she has got a certain quality about her that makes you think sheâd be a really good fuck. More so than Kate even, although I would let her Watch.
Hahaha. Off to the Tower with you Bearsy, and wash your mouth out with soap and water.
Funnily enough whenever i hear the words Meghan Markle i immediately think of Fred West. Am i the only one?
I think of a race horse.
I think I may have problems.
Prince Andrew wanted to marry soft porn starlett Koo Stark. Harry get himself another sulty American actress. Charles ends up with someone who looks like his mother. Being next in line to the throne isnt all it is cracked up to be!
I thought it was all about the bass then realised it was the wrong Meghan.
Then I thought he was marrying the German chancellorâŚI was geting my Merkelâs in a muddle
Does anyone know if theyâll be honeymooning at BroadlandsâŚit seems to be something of a tradition for the âHouse of Hanoverâ.
If so I shall be there with my good lady and our little Union Jacks.
Canât waitâŚisnât it exciting.
He seems alright for a Royal, to be honest. Not a massive twat like Andrew or a weed gobbler like his stepdad. She seems to be a half tidy bag of carrots too. It will be amusing to see if some stuffy old bastards get upset with him marrying an âoutsiderâ.
Apparently the Daily Heil website has gone into meltdown. Their readership is less than impressed with a common American divorcee becoming a âRoyalâ. And not a pure aryan to boot. Oh dear!
As soon as she is married she will be known as HRH The Duchess of Sussex. Not in this fucking household she wonât.